Caring for an elderly parent jointly with siblings can be an experience to strengthen the sibling bond for life. Though it often can easily become a competition or taken as a sign of who loves or cares about your parents the most, guard against this. Instead, let caring for loved ones through mutual cooperation build strength of character and bring out the goodness inside everyone. Let it draw you closer together and bring healing.
Caregiving for Parents: Putting The Past Behind
Siblings typically have a history, checkered with both good and bad memories which are carried into adulthood. Regardless of this history, when your parents get older, they don’t have anybody but you to care for them and provide the highest quality of life possible. This means seeking peace with your siblings over the past and working together on behalf of your parents.
You will experience a closer bond with your brothers or sisters that comes through working together through hard times. In addition to putting the past behind you, here are some other things to consider:
- Guard yourself against thinking you’re the only one giving care for your parents. This can alienate the others and divide mutual efforts.
- If you’re located further away than your siblings, let those who are closest make decisions about their day to day life. It’s best to refrain from making too many critiques of the primary caretakers’ efforts unless of course there is immediate danger.
- Everyone needs to be open to working as a team and accepting the ways each sibling can help. You are always stronger together.
- Share the financial burden in as equitable a way as possible. Everyone needs to be fair and as generous as you can.
- If you live far from your parents then finding a service to arrange grocery delivery is an excellent way to contribute.
Appreciation Can Make The Difference
Caregiving for parents is a beautiful way to honor them in the last leg of their life journey. Even though you may have differences with your siblings, allow the compassion you feel for your loved ones who grow old and the desire to make their life as comfortable as possible be the driving force that strengthens the bond between you. If you can appreciate the efforts that others make, that appreciation can be the glue that holds your bond together. Couple that with good communication, and all your love, you will have a strong bond that lasts a lifetime.
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